POD Reviews The Emmys!
It's Only My Opinion with Jam Master C. K. & The Furious Two. POD
Star Style with The Interns. Star Jones Takes On POD Editor Caroline Kinsley. P.S.--POD Readers Have Their Say. Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down. The
Polls.
POD Goes To The Emmys!!
POD:
Emmy 2003 Brings Back Nurses' Ball!
In a surprising move, ABC
decided to bring the Nurses' Ball to the 2003 Emmys!
Formerly General Hospital's premiere annual event to raise awareness of AIDS, the Emmys
opted for a more stripped down version of this must-see showstopper. Excluded were variety acts in favor of
an extended Jam Session usually reserved for the Nurses' Ball finale. Even so, it was still great
to see this crowd-pleasing event return.
While we missed the Katherine Bell and Lucy Coe banter
and were a little confused about the context, the singing soapers brought a tear to many an eye!
This year the singing acts included
the many talents of operatic great Ron Raines and the modern sound stylings of
Kassie De Paiva who brought contemporary hits like the B-52'sLove Shack to the forefront!
Two singing novices made VH1'sDivas look like amateur night.
Eva's new CD....Only You
Click to purchase!
Hello Eden
Riegel and Eva La Rue. In a surprise announcement the U.S.Navy has invited Riegel to contribute to deep-sea sound
tests in an effort to provide a barricade between personnel and dangerous killer whales. Her decibel range matches perfectly
with the required vibrations to repel dogs, whales, and humans.
Congratulations,Eden! It just goes to show, you never know
who's watching.
Later this year, Eden
and her band The Garden (very cute!) expect to take it on the
road. What will this mean for Blanca's future on All My Children?
Next year we expect to see even
more of daytime's most wanted on that stage. It's a tough bill to get in on, word has it that Maurice
Benard and Eric Braeden are planning
a duet in the hopes their combined superstardom will land them a slot.
NLG's hopes her new CD will put her...
...in the 2004 Emmy All-Star Soap jam.
Nancy
Lee Grahn has already gotten on the ground floor by masquerading as a man, Dobson,
on her soap General Hospital. Apparently Ms. Grahn hopes
to audition as Dobson if her own audition doesn't make the cut. Tamara Braun is on the list to sing backup, but its a very long list, PODdoesn't think she'll make it.
Stay tuned to ABC
for details on how you can send a text message through your cell phone to pick next year's acts! Who will make it, who won't?
You decide.
Breaking
News: Star Jones takes on POD's Caroline Kinsley
What started
out as Pre-Emmy fun, quickly turned nasty last week as POD's
very own editor sat down with the ladies of The View and got more than she bargained for!
"That
Star bitch called me annoying!" groaned our long time columnist and editor. "All I did was predict
Doctor Phil would win."
Sources say
there is more to the story however. An unidentified source saw the two ladies exchange ugly words backstage before the show,
when they both reached for the same glazed donut.
Co-host Meredith Vieira reportedly advised Starr to allow
Kinsley to have the last donut, prompting Starr Jones
to throw a temper tantrum minutes before airtime.
"Star
was in a real nasty mood. She hasn't liked Kinsley for a while," reports a set side source. "These
are two personalities strongly clashing."
So
what does our editor have to say for herself?
"I'll
smack dat bitch up," retorts Kinsley. "Star Jones is
so fat she wears a VCR for a beeper."
Jones, not letting Kinsley get the best of her had
her own jab: "That POD bitch is so old her social security number is 1."
We will
keep you advised of any further developments in this on going soap opera.
*********
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It's Only My Opinion... with Jam Master C. K. & The Furious Two!
Dear Opinionaters,
Watching this year's loser of an
Emmy show I was only inspired by affable Wayne Brady,
as he pitched ultra cool rap music to the fans. I too want to get jiggy with it. I'm going to do my thing. Me and my girls
are going to represent. It's Rappers' ---Delight Donut Style!!!
Caroline:I said a hip hop the hippie the hippie to the hip hip hop, a you don't stop the rock it to the bang bang boogie say up jumped the boogie to the rhythm of the boogie, the beat
!
Now what you hear is not a test--
I'm rappin' to the soap opera beat.
And me, I work so my friends
are gonna get in my magazine.
See I'm editor & I like to give
a shout out to my pals
& all my minions.
I can talk smack all I want, cuz
in the end...
it's "only my opinion."
Jam Master C.K. & The Furious Two!
But first I gotta bang bang the
boogie to the boogie.
Say up jump the boogie to the bang
bang boogie.
Let's donut dunk, you don't stop.
Rock the jelly that will make donut
rock .
Well I brought along two friends
of mine to rock with me.
And next on the mike is my girl
Stafford...
Come on, Shelly,
shake that booty & your jelly!
MS:
Check it out, I'm the S-T-A-F-F-O-R-D.
And the rest is Y&R!
Ya see I go to the awards &
shake my booty on the stage
for all the world to see.
I'm feeling fine, but I can't believe
I lost
to a woman who looks like Tyne Daly.
And I get press to the tee, I'm
friends with Kinsley
The only one she loves more is my'girl
Nancy!
Take it Nance!
NLG:I said a hip hop the hippie the hippie to the hip hip hop, a you don't stop the rock it to the bang bang boogie. Say up jumped the boogie to the rhythm of the boogie, the beat!!
Well I'm riding high about this
character I created.
I ain't feeling bad, about
losing bad.
It's really an honor to be nominated!
Alright you caught me, I'm a liar.
I would rather eat glass.
And I want to kick Guza's ass.
For making Mrs. Doubtfire!
I'm Leading Lady,
& it's about time!
I want a supporting cast to support
me.
But how the hell does it work out
That everyone supports Courtney!
I got my friends at the mags,
but fans call me HAG.
Tough luck. I got the baby!
Break it out!
Yo!
***********
Thumbs
Up/Thumbs Down - The Emmys!
Thumbs down:
Killing Us Softly...
While we fully support any one over
the age of 40, and do admire the bravado performances of Susan Flannery, we were
stunned at the major slights directed towards Nancy Lee Grahn. A tough night all
around. She didn't present. She didn't win. She didn't get thanked and they didn't even roll the clip where she engaged in
ash wrestling. Here's hoping next year will be kinder to her, we can envision the Emmy clips of her as Dobson
now. Chin up, kiddo!
Thumbs Up
AND Down: Up with People!
We have a split vote when it comes
to Soaps All Star Singing Band. While nothing made us tap our wrinkled toes more
than aging soap stars belting out the tunes, did they have to use that loud crazy rap music???? From Love Shack
to When a Man loves a Woman, we needed earplugs! Not all the audience are young teens ya know! And
simmer down Wally; you don't need to get on our piss list any further.
Thumbs Up:
Vanessa in the Skye with Diamonds...
Here at POD
we are ELATED that Vanessa won Best Supporting Actress.
A well deserved win for the girl that pays our bills and keeps our donut boxes full. While it was a bit sad to see Robin Christopher lose (spare a square next time maybe?) Vanessa's 3
months stint on GH was nothing short of amazing. We love you princess! Call us if you need some press
`kay?
Star
Style Takes on...
The EMMY
Awards!
Thanks for the pic, Jenna!
They're baaaaaack !!
The POD Interns take on Emmy style! Let's see
how your favorites added up!!
The 2003
Emmys were a total blast gang!! Whether it was throwing up in the bathroom or chasing Jamal
from PC around, we sure know how to kick off our shoes and have fun. Let's take a look at our best
and worst dressed of the Daytime Emmys.
First up:Nancy Lee Grahn
Skippy:
Oh wow, simply lovely!
Dippy:
Shake whacha momma gave ya!
Tippy:
A vision in yellow !
Skippy:
She's Chiquita Banana & she's here to say, an Emmy
is something you should win everyday!
Dippy:
I aspire to her greatness.
Let's move on to:Tamara Braun!
Skippy:
Oh my.
Dippy:
(Snort) What-ever!
Tippy:
Why is Tamara wearing a bird around her?
Skippy:
That is hideous.
Dippy:
The bird look is so 5 minutes ago.
Tippy:
I am humiliated for her.
Dippy:
Totally.
Next let's move on to:The Fabulous Susan Flannery!
Skippy:
Gasp. Be still my heart.
Dippy:
A vision.
Tippy:Thank God for soap seniors, at least they pull off good fashion.
Skippy:
She's simply lovely. Time does wonders for her.
Dippy:
This almost tops Nancy.
Skippy:
Almost.
Tippy:
Don't get ahead of yourself Dip.
Dippy:
Sorry Tip.
Here's a photo of Tamara Braun at the Post Emmy Party:
Skippy:
(Groan) Oh...
Dippy:
Gross.
Tippy:Tamara once again fails with the flapper look.
Dippy:
I weep for her stylist.
Skippy:
This outfit gives me the Jitterbugs.
Tippy:
Good one Skip!
Skippy:
Thanks Tip!
Next we are on to...Oh...ahem...it's
another Tamara photo. Well I guess little Ms. Toast of the Town
has been out and about. What-ever. Let's take a look.
Skippy:
Oh my goodness!
Tippy:
What the??
Dippy:
Absolutely awful!
Skippy:Nancy save us !
Tippy:
That head-piece scares me!
Skippy:
I'm repulsed!! Kim Zimmer alert!
Dippy:
I am so over NuCarly, let's go to Cinnibun.
Tippy:
Heh heh, killer! Smoothie on me !
P.S.
--POD Readers Have Their Say...
P.S.
I sincerely hope that you force Emmy winner Maurice Bernard to issue a post speech thanks to all the people
he forgot to thank, but not including that bitch Carly! As if he won this Emmy on his own! Tell him that a statement better
be released or I am arriving at his door with a machete.
Y. Usocraze'
Los
Angeles CA
P.S.
Clearly there must be a mistake with Bob Guza and Chuck Pratt winning the writing awards. And clearly
there must be a mistake for Maurice Bernard winning and bringing the audience to its feet. And clearly there must be a mistake
for GH to be #1 in demos. There is conspiracy behind this. Oh yes, there is. And when I'm through with the advertisers you'll
wish you never messed with me.
Y. Uhavenolife
Seattle
Washington
P.S.
Now that Vanessa has won best actress awards will you puulllllease let her come back to GH? Does Tony
Geary really need a dressing room? Give it to Cassius!
Sally
T
Miami,
FL
P.S.
Carly should be raped, you heard me right. Carly should be raped, the whole darn night. Rape to the left,
rape to the right. Rape Carly rape Carly, fight, fight, fight!
Y. Usofreekee
Chicago,
IL
P.S.
As community college professor from Vermont, I need to explain to you my utter disgust with this focking
"Dobson" story. I thought I endured it all with the wig. Then I thought I endured it all with the tambourine. Then her at
the stake??!! GH what is wrong with you??? How do you expect me to masturbate to this creepy She-Man???!! I am writing to
the Cross Dressers Society of America and you will be sure you haven't heard the last of me!!!!!
